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Author Topic: Exploding Pork  (Read 5416 times)

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Offline SasquatchMan

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Exploding Pork
« on: December 27, 2003, 04:35:32 PM »
I swear this is true.

The bourbon and wine glaze on our Christmas ham ignited in the oven, blew the door open with a "whoompf", and scared the dingleberries out of everyone.  I'm thinking lawsuit. :D :D :-/
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Offline Jeff

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #1 on: December 27, 2003, 04:38:05 PM »
Yea, I think if I was that pig I'd sue yer butt too. ;)
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Offline Haytrader

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #2 on: December 27, 2003, 04:40:23 PM »
Who ya gonna sue, bourbon distiller, wine maker, or the oven manufacterer?
I guess you wouldn't sue the cook............. ;)
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Offline Fla._Deadheader

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #3 on: December 27, 2003, 04:43:27 PM »
Well, DUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh  :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
All truth passes through three stages:
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   Second, it is violently opposed; and
   Third, it is accepted as self-evident.

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Offline Frank_Pender

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #4 on: December 27, 2003, 04:52:26 PM »
It sounds like you need to find yourself a rell hungry attorney. ;D
Frank Pender

Offline SasquatchMan

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #5 on: December 27, 2003, 04:56:46 PM »
I was thinking to sue the recipe writer, actually.   ;)  They said nothing at all about possible porcine projectiles.  It isn't surprising at all, but my wife isn't exactly a chemist and she just followed the instructions.  The ham was delicious -- one of the best glazes I've ever tasted.  But apparently highly flammable at 350!

Thanks for your support, Deadheader.
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Offline Fla._Deadheader

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #6 on: December 27, 2003, 05:47:41 PM »
 :D :D :D :D :D :D :D  Thought ya might preesheeate it, Sas.  ;D
All truth passes through three stages:
   First, it is ridiculed;
   Second, it is violently opposed; and
   Third, it is accepted as self-evident.

-- Arthur Schopenhauer (1788-1860)

Offline Fla._Deadheader

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #7 on: December 27, 2003, 07:41:19 PM »
Sasquatchman,

Went to bed and realised that my response was probably taken the wrong way. If it was, I apologize. I was reacting to the term "suing".
All truth passes through three stages:
   First, it is ridiculed;
   Second, it is violently opposed; and
   Third, it is accepted as self-evident.

-- Arthur Schopenhauer (1788-1860)

Offline Duane_Moore

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #8 on: December 27, 2003, 08:35:07 PM »
 :D :D :D told ya about cookin them piggies, God got ya for that one, what a funny story ;D                ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D :D :D :D :D :D :D         Duane
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Offline SasquatchMan

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #9 on: December 27, 2003, 09:09:59 PM »
Oi Deadheader, it takes a wee bit more than that to offend me.  In fact, having read the recipe, I sort of told my wife the same thing "What the hell d'ya expect?"

I just thought lawsuits were part of the American way - I'm trying to fit in! ;D

I hadn't seen the Biblical implications until just now... next year I'll bourbon glaze the turkey and leave the ham with mustard and honey - see what old G thinks of that. ;)
Senior Member?  That's funny.

Offline Duane_Moore

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #10 on: December 27, 2003, 10:19:05 PM »
 :D :D :D  Ol Deadheader,  maybe the answer to your Black Powder Detonator,,   hows about that Jeff?? :D :D :D :D :D :D
village Idiot---   the cat fixers----  I am not a complete Idiot. some parts missing.

Offline woodmills1

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #11 on: December 28, 2003, 02:03:06 AM »
Years ago Kathy and I decided to cook from aa old recipe that included a flambe(sp?)  Well we didn't have any brandy so we mixed some vodka with triple sec and pooof almost lit the ceiling on fire! :o
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Offline dan-l-b

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #12 on: December 28, 2003, 05:09:44 AM »
I'm with Jeff,  may be lucky no self respecting porker would wallow so low as to hire an attorney or ya might have a bigger explosion on your hands :D :D :D :D :D

Offline L. Wakefield

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #13 on: December 28, 2003, 05:10:52 AM »
   I've been doing 'marsala' recipes, and have learned to be sure the cupboard doors above the stove are closed prior to ignition. At the greatest extent I have had flames greater than 1' high. Sure is fun at my place- tastes good too.

  As far as the orig recipe you were talking about- plenty of those glazes just have a 'taste' of bourbon or wine, so I'd say the recipe itself was the problem.   lw
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Offline Mark M

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #14 on: December 28, 2003, 09:06:51 AM »
It's a good thing your wife wasn't cooking baked beans with that glaze. We would have been reading about a big mushroom cloud over Alberta! :o

Couse that might be better than those small mushroom clouds that appear several hours after ya eat them beans. ;)

Offline Texas Ranger

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #15 on: December 28, 2003, 09:34:26 AM »
DanG, I thought he was gonna talk about our pet sow when she :o got into Grandpa's cooked out mash.
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Offline dan-l-b

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #16 on: December 28, 2003, 03:27:25 PM »
I had a pet pig named Gertrude.   :D :D Found her orphaned at the back of our hog lot with eresephalis (SP) in her back legs.  I was living in an apartment in st louis at the time.  Had her trained to a litter box, at night she would sleep with me (i was single back then) straddling my neck.  As she got older and stronger she got louder.  Nieghbors complained and I returned her to the farm.  When she was big enough, I butchered her.  Sounds a little heartless but I figured that is what a hog aspires to - to be on thier masters dinner table. ;) ;)

Offline Gus

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #17 on: December 29, 2003, 11:18:01 AM »
Dan,
My uncle had a hankering for mutton. He always had a bum lamb around that he would invariably name "Lamb Chops". It always came up missing in the fall. When his kids were little they could never figure out where Lamb Chops went to. ;)
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Offline Percy

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #18 on: December 29, 2003, 11:42:01 AM »
Quote
I swear this is true.

The bourbon and wine glaze on our Christmas ham ignited in the oven, blew the door open with a "whoompf", and scared the dingleberries out of everyone.  I'm thinking lawsuit. :D :D :-/



:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D (said with a MAXWELL SMART accent) "Ah yes, the old exploding pig trick. Hey 99, you have any Grey Poupon?" :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
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Offline SwampDonkey

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #19 on: January 24, 2004, 10:36:26 AM »
 :D :D laughing out loud  :D :D

Can you here me out there on the west coast?  ;D

I just had to read this thread he he he... ;D

Pre-commercial thinning pays off. :)

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Offline etat

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #20 on: January 24, 2004, 03:32:21 PM »
Up until the year after we bought this place I hadn't helped kill hogs since before I was a teenager.  The kids I thought needed the experience at least once in their life.   So just before winter I bought a couple of them long bodied white hogs.  They were just a little over half grown.  As I only wanted to condition them for killing I put them in a VERY small stable.  Boarded it up real good with 2/4's.  Fed them a straight diet of shelled corn for about two months and all the water they wanted.   When we got ready to kill them I put a hog pole on my tractor.  Had a big barrel fixed to heat water in, sharpened the knives, cleaned the sausage grinder, got the sausage seasoning, got the suger cure salt, and sharpened all the knives.  

We killed both of the hogs the same day.  Early one morning.  (one at a time).  We had a big fire heating the water in the barrel.  We'd dip that hog in, pull him out, and start scraping the hair off.  Once we had him real clean and washed down we gutted him, and hung him in the barn.  Then we did the same to the other.  First thing we cut was the shoulders, the hams, the hog jowels, and the middlin (bacon).  We set these aside to be cured.  Now I'm not much on hog heads or feet so we gave these away to someone who wanted to make mince meat and pickle the feet.  Ugg.  

By then we had a small fire going under some big ole black washpots.  As we removed the fat, and the trimmins on the rest of the hog we'd cut them in small pieces to throw in the washpot to cook out the lard.  As it cooked out pieces of the skin and some trimmins of meat would cook to the top.  These are crispy but not blown up like pork skins.  Good eating hot and they are called cracklins.  You eat as you're processing the rest of the meat until it about makes you sick.  Some of the cracklins you save to make cracklin cornbread, and some you feed to the dogs.

Now, I've never tried chittlins so I just went ahead and discared the entrails, all but the liver.  I like fresh pork liver.  

The better cuts, especially the tenderloin gets trimmed and wrapped for the freezer.  

As I said, the hams, the shoulders, the jowels, and the middlins get salted down and hung to cure.  Some smoke these for a few days, but I just kept them rubbed down with suger cure salt for a few days until all the moisture is drawed out and they start curing.

A lot of the hog we cut  up for sausage. You need some fat with it.  We used sausage seasioning and red pepper flakes. .  What we had to do to get them right was season the batch, cook a few sausage, everybody taste a piece, and debate how much more seasioning they needed.  If you don't use too much right off the bat, you'll soon get it just right.    Oh, we ground all the sausage with a hand grinder.  Mother had previously bleached some sheets, didn't have old flower sacks, and sewed them together to pack the sausage in.  We hung the sacked sausage for a few days to cure before we put it in the freezer.  (Try buyin them kind in a store)

We poured up and strained the lard and used it for biscuits and cooking.  Now we don't do that all the time cause they say it ain't healthy, but boy does that lard make good biscuits, and for seasioning vegetables.  Cat fish deepfried in lard is fitten to eat too.

It was a long day for us amateurs doing all that.  Dad did the supervising, and kept us on track.  The first shoulder I had cut off we had seasoned and wrapped with aluminum foil and burried in the coals in the hole we had dug in the ground to heat the barrel.  Man, that was some good eating, and I think the whole experience was  good for the kids.  We haven't tried it again, whole hog, however about once a year or so we buy a small pig and skin and dress it and cook it in the ground whole. 8)
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Offline SwampDonkey

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #21 on: January 24, 2004, 03:47:53 PM »
@ cktate

I'm not much for pork myself, except a slice of nice ham now and again but I know an 'ole gal that would be drooling over what you wrote. She is native and she loves pork and pork lard. The natives around here used to eat that lard with bread to soak it up.....mmmm mmmm good :D

My uncle takes care of the 'ole gal 3 days a week. She's 91 I think and an exception to heart disease theory, cause she also smokes :)


regards

Pre-commercial thinning pays off. :)

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Offline oldsaw-addict

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #22 on: January 25, 2004, 06:17:46 PM »
I aint never seen no pork covered in flammable things put in the oven blow up before, but then again, I aint never tried puttin no pork in the oven with somethin that'll cause fire or an explosion before either. Of course this is what happens when you rut somethin covered with bourbon in the oven, it catches fire the pressure builds and the thing goes shootin out like it was fired from a cannon.  :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D Maybe I better shut up now. :-X
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Offline SasquatchMan

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #23 on: January 25, 2004, 07:21:02 PM »
 :D :D :D
IT DOESN'T SAY "FLAMMABLE" ANYWHERE ON THE BOTTLE!!!!!
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Offline Duane_Moore

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #24 on: January 25, 2004, 11:14:07 PM »
 :Pck.  did ya make any lye soap?? boy can I remember that stuff. had my mouth washed out with it many times.  Duh---Duane ???  fresh side pork... my fovorite ;)
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Offline etat

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #25 on: January 26, 2004, 12:11:23 AM »
Duane, actually I have.  Mr and Mrs Lamar Elliot who used to keep me and my brother used to make it once or twice a year.  I can't remember all the details just that it was a lot of fun watching and helping.   Their children, Charles Liddel, and Mrs. Kateth  had suffered from polio when they were very young.  Charles Liddel was wheelchair bound, and Mrs. Kateth had to wear braces.  Still they worked around the house Charles Liddel could drive and they played with us kids.  Nothing much slowed them down for two reasons, one, because they didn't want it too and because they had to.  They were very poor.  Mrs. Keyrons speciality cooking was potato soup, boy could she make it taste good.  

They were a great inspriation to me in raising my youngest son Jeremy.  By the time he was two years old he had two open heart surgeries . His right side doesn't work so good.  Botox treatments has helped a lot with his walking and use of his hand.  I just found out lately that when he was very young my older kids used to use him in their experiments, such as putting him in a barrel and rolling him down a hill before they'd try it!  Really, hasn't much ever slowed him down.  I've even seen him tote whole bundles of shingles up a ladder just to see if he could!  When he was born he weighed 2.4 lbs.  Now he's pushing 6 FEET TALL!  

I was wondering if anyone else had ever helped make lye soap or pump water out of a well! ! :)   Guess I was lucky, never had it in my mouth! ;D  But I sure did hate having to go and cut a switch!!!!!!! ;D
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Offline Haytrader

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #26 on: January 26, 2004, 04:14:01 AM »
    We had neighborhood butcherings when I was a kid. My grandfather would have a couple hogs, my dad the same, and seems like two or three neighbors with a few. Since my grandparents had a new double garage with a washroom attached, they were the hosts of the event. A loader tractor was used to lift the hogs out of the pen and to dip them in one of the barrels of very hot water. Propane was used to heat the water.
    Once the hogs were scalded and gutted, they were split and moved inside. Work tables were made by laying plywood on sawhorses with sheets covering them. The processing was done assembly line fashion with both men and women involved. I am sure I had a job but can't remember what it was as I was small at the time.
    I do remember they injected the hams with a syringe and hung them in burlap sacks while they cured.
    One of my brothers owns the place now and the garage is so full of "stuff" that there is no way you could get a hog in there. Barely a package of bacon.

:D  :D  :D
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Offline SwampDonkey

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #27 on: January 26, 2004, 05:31:23 AM »
 ;D  ;D  ;D  ;D  ;D  ;D


Sounds just as fun as chasing the be-headed chickens through the burdock patch when Mr McGrath chopped the heads off with the axe on the hardwood choppin block.  :-/

bock bock buck-okkkkkk!


;D

Pre-commercial thinning pays off. :)

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Offline jayhdjr

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #28 on: January 28, 2018, 11:06:11 AM »
I laughed so hard on page one, I had to see who else hadn't seen this yet. LOL
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Offline starmac

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #29 on: January 28, 2018, 03:43:52 PM »
When we butchered hogs at home, we would do the taste test to get the sausage seasoning just right too. We would normally make all the sausage one or two hogs would make along with all the other cuts, then grind a whole hog less the hams into sausage, as we liked our sausage. I remember one year we done a whole hog up in sausage with dad and I doing the seasoning, when done we had it hot enough that mom or none of my sisters would eat it, so we had it all to ourselves, man that was some good sausage.

And old man down the road had a truck farm I picked vegetables on, could no longer eat pork, but he had some antique processing equipment and really farm equipment of all sorts. He had a huge cast iron hog scalding vat, probably the only actual store bought one I have ever seen. He also had a sausage grinder that ran off of the endless belt pto of his tractor. This grinder had a throat that was over a foot in diameter and stood about 3 feet tall. This stuff had not been used in several years by the time I got to know him, and just sit out in the weather, but I tried and tried to buy them, but he wouldn't even talk about selling.
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Offline coxy

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #30 on: January 28, 2018, 04:26:19 PM »
 :D :D funny story       I remember when I was 6-7 we had a guy come up and cut  our pigs  he wouldn't shoot them but after the first one got stuck the second came through the 5 board 2x8 fence and ran me over causing me to get my first 6 stiches in my head  after 2 days of looking for the pig the guys son shot it in the head with a 30-30 said he was tired of looking for it and chasing it  ;D to this day I can not kill a pig or a cow  I can be there when its done but cant do it  and I really miss the fresh pork rinds we use to make  we would cook them down on our wood stove it was always a battle between my dad and I who was going to get in the pot first to get the good ones  oh and cant forget about the how great the doughnuts where with the fresh pig fat uummmmm

Online 47sawdust

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #31 on: January 28, 2018, 04:34:38 PM »
I didn't realize how old this post was until I saw ,"In Memorian" next to a few posts.
Kinda like Dead man Talkin'
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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #32 on: January 28, 2018, 04:46:10 PM »
I was never much for Pork until I marred my Dominican wife.
Now we cook a whole pig every summer.

 

 
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Offline Jeff

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #33 on: January 28, 2018, 05:02:07 PM »
What a novel idea!
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Offline DanG

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #34 on: January 28, 2018, 05:35:27 PM »
I didn't realize how old this post was until I saw ,"In Memorian" next to a few posts.
Kinda like Dead man Talkin'

I love it when someone brings up one of these old fun threads from days of yore.  It brings back some fond memories of some members who are no longer with us. :)
"I don't feel like an old man.  I feel like a young man who has something wrong with him."  Dick Cavett
"Beat not thy sword into a plowshare, rather beat the sword of thine enemy into a plowshare."

Offline starmac

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #35 on: January 28, 2018, 05:38:13 PM »
I always ate a lot of pork, we raised hogs growing up and always had somewhere between 50 and 300 head, but I never was around anybody roasting a whole pig. I always heard they were good, and most I heard of roasted them with an apple in their mouth.

Depending on who made it, I liked head cheese, or hated it. I don't remember us ever making any ourselves, we would cook the heads down and mom would make tomales out of the head meat, which was some good vittles.
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Offline coxy

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #36 on: January 29, 2018, 06:59:44 AM »
yum yum haven't had fresh head cheese in years  but your right its good or garbage

Offline petefrom bearswamp

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #37 on: January 29, 2018, 06:37:12 PM »
Head cheese? no but pig roast in Harrison Michigan you bet
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Offline starmac

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #38 on: January 29, 2018, 07:59:26 PM »
Not pork, well there probably was some ham hocks or salt pork or something in it, but my wifes grandmother had a pressure cooker blow up with pinto beans, it caused quite a commotion, and when they finally tore the old farmhouse down, you could still see the claw marks in the sheetrock across the living room ceiling the cat left.
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Offline coxy

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #39 on: January 29, 2018, 10:57:53 PM »
Head cheese? no but pig roast in Harrison Michigan you bet
you don't know what your missing

Offline justallan1

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #40 on: February 03, 2018, 07:03:15 PM »
Okay no pig stories, but this whole post was pure entertainment!

Offline sawguy21

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #41 on: February 03, 2018, 09:54:55 PM »
Not pork, well there probably was some ham hocks or salt pork or something in it, but my wifes grandmother had a pressure cooker blow up with pinto beans, it caused quite a commotion, and when they finally tore the old farmhouse down, you could still see the claw marks in the sheetrock across the living room ceiling the cat left.
:D :D :D I bet the cat wasn't the only one running for cover. We bought a pig from close friends, Karen, the city girl, was quite fascinated watching it grow and named it Marie. She almost fell over laughing when I reminded her that was my ex girlfriends name. Dave fattened it on fruit, kitchen scraps as well as whey from the cheese plant, I have never had better pork. I was reluctant to try head cheese but held my nose and went for it, actually makes a fine sammich.
old age and treachery will always overcome youth and enthusiasm

Offline Kbeitz

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #42 on: February 03, 2018, 11:41:01 PM »
Okay no pig stories, but this whole post was pure entertainment!

Gotta keep it going...

 

 
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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #43 on: February 04, 2018, 08:46:39 AM »
The adidas jackets adds something.  ;D
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Offline DaveinNH

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Re: Exploding Pork
« Reply #44 on: February 04, 2018, 09:38:50 AM »
Shouldn't the passengers be wearing helmets as well?
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