Variations On Murphy's Law

[sawhead]

1. The Law of Common Sense: Never accept a drink from a urologist.
2. The Law of Reality: Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
3. The Law of Self Sacrifice: When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.
4. The Law of Volunteering: If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead.
5. The Law of Avoiding Oversell: When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.
6. The Law of Motivation: Creativity is great, but plagiarism is faster.
7. Boob's Law: You always find something in the last place you look.
8. Wailer's Law: Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.
9. Law of Probable Dispersal: Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
10. Law of Volunteer Labor: People are always available for work in the past tense.
11. Conway's Law: In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.
12. Iron Law of Distribution: Them that has, gets.
13. Law of Cybernetic Entomology: There is always one more bug.
14. Law of Drunkenness: You can't fall off the floor.
15. Heeler's Law: The first myth of management is that it exists.
16. Osborne's Law: Variables won't; constants aren't.
17. Main's Law: For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
18. Weinberg's Second Law: If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would have destroyed civilization. ;D

[sawguy21]

I like #18 ;D

[Dan_Shade]

I think I work with a few folks who don't understand #8

[Fraxinus]

I've been told that Murphy's Law wasn't made up by Murphy at all but by some other fellow with the same name. :D

[asy]

I seem to be living by O'Toole's law, which states: "Murphy was an Optimist"...    :-\

asy :D

[Beweller]

# 14 is not true.  I have a counter example.  Had a Tech who opened the utility trench, turned around, stepped backward, and FELL OFF THE FLOOR!

[TW]

Bergman's laws in translation from Swedish:

1 Anything can be made from plastic but none of it will last.

2 Should it happen to last, then it is a too expensive kind of plastic to use for serial production.

[Murf]

Or the financial version of # 12, the Iron Law, which is the Golden Rule.....

The man with the gold makes the rules........    :