Todays lesson in speaking Kiwi.

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day Guys,
This post starts from where the Cypress Crotch thread rambled (in a nice way) to:
https://forestryforum.com/board/index.php/topic,1540.0.html

I threatened to throw some good Kiwi lingo in here, as I was getting terribly confused with the localisms there! ;)  Although I must say it was all very well explained to me.
Now you wouldn't normally get this so full on, but it gives you an idea of the local speak!  I will post the normal version straight after this, in case theres any confusion!  You may know some of the terms anyway.  Im sure they all cant be unique to NZ. ;D ???

Yesterday I was asked to do a job for a bloke.  It was out in the wop wops, so at sparrows fart, I chucked on my gummies, grabbed a swannie and a jumper, and headed over to suss it out.  On the way, I spat the dummy, realising I forgot the sarnies.  It was a real tiki tour getting to the guys place.  Spent the first hour chewing the fat with him, then cranked into it.  Its was hard yakka from the start.  Managed to scab a couple of dead-eyes off the guy for lunch.   All hunky-dory in the end but.  Paid me in folding – sweet.  Said hooray and took off.

On the way home, saw a real spinner, hooning it down the road.  He was rarking it up, pulling doughies.  I laughed when his car carked it. Good job.  He was packing a major sad.
A mate rang me on the cell, and said to rattle my dags down to the pub, but I piked out, saying I was too rooted.
Stopped off for some greasies and a slab, before heading home.  Man was I fagged.  After a couple of stubbies, I crashed.

Cheers
Charlie  ;) ;)

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day Guys,

OK, heres the normal version with the explanations if needed.

Yesterday I was asked to do a job for a man.  It was out in the middle of nowhere, so at dawn, I put on my gumboots, grabbed a Swandri (a tight knit wool bush jacket, very warm) and a woolen jersey, and headed over to check it out.  On the way, I got mad, realising I forgot the sandwiches.  It was a real hard time finding/drove all round the place getting to the guys place.  Spent the first hour talking about general things with him, then got into it.  Its was hard work from the start.  Managed to get for free, a couple of meat pies off the guy for lunch.   All went well/was good/ok in the end.  Paid me in cash – excellent.  Said goodbye and took off.

On the way home, saw a real idiot/fool, driving stupidly/fast down the road,.  He was spinning the wheels/gunning it, pulling doughnuts (spinning in circles).  I laughed when his car died/stopped. Serves you right.  He was having a very big tantrum.
A mate rang me on the mobile phone, and said to hurry up/rush down to the pub, but I didn't go/gave up, saying I was too tired.
Stopped off for some deep fried food/fish and chips (french fries)/hot dogs etc and a cardboard tray with 2 dozen beers on it, before heading home.  Man was I really tired.  After a couple of 355ml bottles of beer, I went to bed and fell asleep straight away.

No worries! :D :D ;) ;)
Cheers
Charlie.

[Tom]

I recognized a couple or three but would hve been totally lost in a conversation like that. :D  Y'all talk funny. :D

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day Tom,

I'll tell you, after typing all those [ b ] and [ /b ], I was SO crosseyed!! :D
And we wouldnt talk that way with visitors/tourists! ;)
Cheers
Charlie.

[DanG]

We gotta git ol' Charlie up here and larn him some proper Anglish!  I unnerstood "rattle yer dags", and know what it means. Ennyboddy else know? ;D

[Tom]

its a good thing.  I'd be looking for a translator.   :P

You did a good job on making the dialects bold.

Y'all still talk funny :D :D

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day DanG,

Is rattle your dags a saying you use locally, or have you heard the origin of it? ???  Lets see if anyone else can offer up where or how it came about/what it relates to! ;)
Cheers
Charlie.

[DanG]

Nawp, t'aint used locally. These rednecks would think I'd lost my mind!  A little Kiwi darlin' on another forum 'splained it to me a couple of years ago. Sumpthin to do with sheep noises, I believe. :

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day DanG,

Lets see if someone can find the meaning, or I will explain it in all its glory!! ;) :D
Cheers
Charlie.

[DanG]

They better get it quick! I've got a Kiwi Country song cookin' in my haid, that'll tell'em more than they want to know. ;D ;D

[Tom]

rattle your dags: hurry up; get a move on. Term is said to come from dirty sheep running with dried excreta hanging from the wool  :D :D :D :P

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day Tom,

Yep, you got it my friend!! ;D  If sheep arent kept shorn (sheared?) round the back, the No.2's tend to stick to the wool, and dry, then more, then dry, etc etc, so they end up with these dried 'attachments' so to speak, and they really do rattle when they run!!  :D :D
Well done Tom, and I thought you were going to bed half an hour ago.......!
Cheers
Charlie.

[DanG]

EXCRETA?  My, aren't we proper, tonight? ;D

I guess my career as a songwriter is over. The world will just have to suffer along in it's accustomed, unenlightened way. :'(

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day DanG,

This is a family forum, try typing in *DanG, and see what happens!!  DOH, its done it again, automatically as well! ;)
I find No.2's do the job well. :D
And there I was hoping to hear your song. Never mind, perhaps its for the better! ;) :D
Cheers
Charlie.

[ButtonRock]

  And I thought those neighboring Rhode Islanders talked funny.  ;D

[Tillaway]

I was working with a crew of Kiwi's and Canadians, it took me a month to figure out what they were saying. ;)

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day Till,

Whats worse is when in Canada (and would probably happen in the States too), people heard my accent, and asked me if I was from Australia!!  >:( >:( >:( >:(  ;D ;)  Now for a Kiwi, obviously, there is a huge difference in the accents, but they couldnt tell the difference, if I spoke some Kiwi, and then said the same thing in Australian!
Cheers
Charlie

[Tillaway]

Charlie,
One new guy made the mistake of calling a Kiwi an Ausie.  The reply was "The difference between New Zealanders and Australians is that we were settlers; they were convicts."  ;)

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day Till,

I tell you, Kiwis and Aussies REALLY, REALLY dont like being called the other.  There is really fierce rivalry between the countries, especially in sport, which I must add, Australia is winning hands down at most of them at the present.
To give you an example of rivalry, two days from now, a Kiwi rugby-league team, is going up against the Aussies for a place in the Grand Final of this years competition.  This has never happened before, and they REALLY dont want us winning!! ;D
There is an Aussie here at work, and Im forever asking to see his ankle scars (from the shackles) !! ;)
Cheers
Charlie.

[KiwiCharlie]

G'day Frank,

It always amazes me how we all speak English, but the terms used from country to country are SO different, it could be another dialect.  Maybe it is exactly that. ???
Cheers
Charlie.