I'm sitting in front of the tube wearing my Sundays best (skivies), wife still asleep and someone knocks at the door.
I see a woman that we met approx 3 years ago and perhaps visited a total of 8 times. She borrowed 60 bucks from the wife about 2 years ago and disappeared.
I open the door, she says "my dad died can I talk to miss moose?", I was like , "erm sorry your dad died, let me get moose because I don't have an empathy gene".
I go wake up moose, and tell her who it was and not to give her many money.
Anyway, she sat and chatted with the wife for at least 2 hours, I even started feeling bad because I know she didn't ask for cash. After she left I asked if the woman wanted money and Moose said she finally asked right before she left.
The story is basically her dad died in TX and needs travel money, she works or worked at a grocery but fell and hurt her back (was walking pretty good on Sunday). She has money to smoke 2 cartons of cigs each week but yet she can't come up with the cash to go to her dads funeral. Which she hasn't seen for 10 years or talked too btw.
Am I being too harsh? or should I have just said "Sorry your not getting any money" and saved everyone 2 hours of their time?
Don't 'cha hate that ??? ??? ???
I have relatives like that...I guess that's why I never go to family stuff.
I also have customers who have filed bankruptcy on me and then a month or two later they are sitting at my parts counter wanting a credit app to open a new account because they have started a new business :o :o :o >:( >:( >:(
Don't you just wonder what wanders around in people's mind sometime? Being eternally curious, I would have first sat her down and said - Now - about that money you borrowed last time - are you coming back to pay it?
It would probably shorten the conversation a tad bit... ::)
A lot of times I say "My name does not include the word bank" or "My busininess is not a lending institution".
What would you say if a person that you know came up to you and said " I am broke and I need x amount of dollars because.... I will make an attempt to repay you in the future, but knowing me I doubt if I will ever have enough money to do this. I am asking for charity."
Would this make a difference?
Its a tough situation with family but this appears to be for the most part a stranger.
IF I was going to help her out the first thing I would do is get the name of the Funeral Home and contact them to confirm the story.
If it is true, the MOST I would do would be to purchase an airline ticket to go to the funeral and then I would TAKE her to the airport to make sure she got on the airplane.
With that being said, I would bet her father did not die (hope he didnt) and she knows she found a soft heart before and maybe she can do it again for more money.
Jims tractor Mechanic STILL has not payed him back yet we see this guy in the local gas station during lunch time buying lottery tickets on a regular basis. Some folks just dont know what there doing to themselves. This guys tractor business has all but dried up becuase of the way he treated Jim.
Chances are the Gal asking form money has dried up all her other hand out points so now she comes to basically a stranger and hopes you havent heard from any of the others she still owes.
Don't stop here to borrow money, you would run out of it about 60' up the road :D :D
I learned the hard way about lending to friends, he borrowed to buy a car since he had just written his off. Well, I heard he was buying a CD player for it and such when he hadn't paid me back yet...
He phoned my one time to stop by and pick up the money so I did a few days later and he says oh well I don't have it now, you should have stopped in when I called. Where did it go? He bought some new shirts.
Nice guy though, went to neo-natal classes with him even, just can't loan him money!
Never had that problem as I have less money then most people I know. :D Actually, if we actually have loaned money to anyone I wouldn't know about it as Tammy is the person that would be approached or have the final say. For me it would have to be a close friend or a family member that has no record with me, or anyone I know.
I have been approached by a couple of very casual members of the forum for a loan. They were casual enough that they apparently didn't understand that the Forestry Forum is not some big dot com that they envisioned and that it is actually ran by an old broken down mill rat and his lovely wife. :)
:D :D :D :D :D ;) :)
Seems to me that as soon as one has any toys in the yard , someone figures out that there is money there . Well there is .... its all tight up in the toys . :o None to go around for hand outs .
Same thing with a pile of lumber ... Had some come over here and want to borrow a few peices of wood ... ::)
One of my In-Laws got hurt at work a while back (was total stupidity on his part that it even happened), and during the time he was off from work *I* payed his phone bill, power bill, and bought them groceries for several months. I expected nothing in return as It was just something I felt a family member should do. At the time, I was making good money and it wasnt a financial strain on me to do it.
That was about 15 years ago....
A couple of years went by, and one of my immediate family members got sick and had to spend some time in the hospital trying to figure out what was wrong with them (mystery disease). I get a call from the In-Law accusing me of mis-treating *MY* family member, accusing me of every evil deed one can imagine, and threatening to kill me on sight if they ever see me again.
When they find out what the illness was, and realize that *I* had nothing to do with it, they wanted to come and appologise.....I accepted the appology, but have kept my distance ever since.
I never have even got a "thank you" from them, or even an acknolegement that I payed their bills and kept them alive for several months. They have plenty of money NOW to buy big boy toys though.
Don't lend money.....it causes AMNESIA ::)
> I am broke and .. I am asking for charity."
> Would this make a difference?
Yes, they would probably get more then if they asked the other way because I could relate to that.
Quote from: isawlogs on January 23, 2006, 11:11:13 AM
Seems to me that as soon as one has any toys in the yard , someone figures out that there is money there . Well there is .... its all tight up in the toys . :o None to go around for hand outs .
The bank ownes the toys in my yard :'(
I'm in the same boat as Jeff, nobody asks to borrow money from me 'cause if they know me good enough to ask something like that. They know me good enough to know I don't have any. :D
They do come by and borrow "stuff" though, I ain't stingy and loan my stuff out. But I have a few guys crossed off the list. My favorite is a dude (who is really good people, just has a habit of not returning stuff).
He wanted to borrow my skidsteer, I said sure just fill it up with fuel if you use it all. We can't buy deisel in town, you have to drive 7 miles to get it. "Sure let me borrow you gas can, and I'll fill it up" He only used the skidsteer for 15 minutes to lift an engine out of the bed of his truck and brought it right back. Well he drove around the rest of the day with my can in the bed, until it blew out. He lost my DanG can!
He needed a piece of rope to pull the top over on a little maple tree he was cutting to get it away from his moms house. "I'll bring it back in 30 minutes" I had a 100' rope, still new in the bag...never saw it again.
The one that got him crossed off my list was my "water ears" for starting an outboard boat motor on a garden hose. He came by 2 springs ago "Hey you got a couple sets of water ears don't you, I need to borrow one for a few minutes, I want to check my boat before I go to the lake"... I was down to one set. He has the NERVE to come around this spring "Hey you got a couple sets of water ears don't you" I told him no I had one- he had one and he wasn't getting the one I had or anything else.
Holy cow Jeff - I thought you were like Donald Trump.
Well, so much for my business plan - I was figuring on hitting up up as an investor... ::)
If you lend someone $60 and never see them again.. it was probably money well spent ;) :D
Ian
Quote from: Ianab on January 23, 2006, 03:12:46 PM
If you lend someone $60 and never see them again.. it was probably money well spent ;) :D
Ian
That's what my uncle always says. There was a couple native folks that kept barrowing money until the weekly check came in. They started coming because my uncle looked after their grand mother, who stopped lending them money becuase she was on to them. The last time they barrowed they never came back to pay it. Good riddence. Their grandmother is dead now and her only living son comes up from CT once in awhile to check on the place and takes my uncle out to dinner on accassion.
Many years ago I went to Moline, Il to work in John Deere. I wasn't ready to join the family farm. I had a friend at work who needed $50., I gave it to him because payday was 2 days away. Would you believe he used the money to buy a bus ticket. :D :D ;D
I told my son and my daughter that if they ever need to borrow money from me for a good reason, I'll try to be there to help them. BUT.....don't come and ask for more until they've paid me back the money they initially borrowed. It has worked very well and my children have always made sure they pay back any money they borrow from me. So if that woman came to my house and asked to borrow money, I'd have told her that I can't loan her any money until she pays back what she already owes. Case closed. :)
Its easy to not let friends borrow money, when you don't have any
friends or money :D :D
Charlie,
You are easy! My kids have to provide a business plan... ::)
What is the difference between a close relative and a distant relative?
A distant relative is a close relative that owes you money!
CRtreedude,
I was thinking along the same line as you. I always thought Jeff's full name was Jeffery "the Trump" B. I was figuring that I could hit him up for a brand new wheeled articulating loader. Then again maybe just a box o' grits ;D ;D
Can you believe the nerve of my parents? They made me sign a note when I borrowed money from them.
When i used to borrow money from my dad the intrest was 100% :o :o.
He would say 10 for 20.
Then i got a job.
Mr Mom
I've got a cousin who's a mooch. He did a stint in the pen a few years back and when he got out he started stopping over now and then to visit. Not a lot and not often but now and then. I've never been concerned about him stealing or anything of that nature but I warned Dee that if I wasn't home to becareful because he was looking to scam money. He knew I wouldn't hand out any but figured Dee as a soft touch ::) Little did he really know. One day I was gone and Ronnie stopped. He starts on this sales pitch about if he had $400 to buy this new tattoo gun he could make so much money...... ::) ;) He didn't get any money and hasn't been around much since then 8)
Ya musta cut into his extracurricular activities. ;D
About 4 years ago the 20-something son of a friend of mine stopped me out in the county and said he couldn't make it to next payday, needed to borrow $20. Said he knew where my office was, would stop by after he got paid the next week and pay me back. Before I gave him the money, I figured, well, I can stand to loose $20. Haven't seen him since.
I just write off money borrowed like that as lost, I don't expect to get repaid, so I don't loan if if I can't afford to loose that much.
I like Ian's quote, money well spent.
Another friend told me that a friend of his asked to borrow $500 to get his car fixed. My friend said, I'll put $500 into an account with your repair shop. What's the name? He said the guy walked off without another word.
I always seem to borrow money to my parents by picking up supplies at fleet farm for the farm. Last spring I bought a rebuilt engine for one of the tractors that was broke. Something like $6500. It was spring time and all the seed and fertilizer bills had my parents running tight. I got paied back 2 months later no problem.
Now if I would borrow money to my sister that would be a different story. Makes more money than me and lives check to check. ??? I ask here where it all goes and she just shrugs her shoulders ::)
Jason
I have loned gfs money never got it back a few grand i learned cheaply and know what not to do. I feel for the people in new orleans but isnt this the same if you buy or support relatives they mooch for a long time and become dependant for some? This also reminds me of some religions that come to the door. Open and you ask great your going to give me money for my time to come to the door and your giving me paper for the fire great i dont have to go to the store. Sorry i am a archie bunker fan and a christian redneck. I agree you get right to the point i dislike friends or i call aquantaces in todays life one thing my ex hated about me was i dont trust people that has to be earned. Family does come first but if you dont like family it just means your not far enough away for them to visit. If they cant pay there telephone bill all the better. This lol convo reminds me of the movie The great outdoors when i first read a few of the responses i love john candy he was a great actor.
My dad and brothers are borrowers of things, tools, lumber,etc. It's the borrow to own program, when I go to their house to recover my property. They have a "coniption fit" and start trying to tell me when and where they bought my tools etc. Note: everything is engraved w/my SS#.
My younger brother thinks I should do things for him " out of the goodness of my heart"! I plow his driveway over 700' and he thinks a check for $100.00 in fuel is enough to cover it. My average 60' driverway pays $50.00 every time I plow. And then if I don't plow him out soon enough he calls to complain... My big concern is my nieces if he didn't have the girls, he be having a great time shoveling.....
Also have started the Photo lineup for borrowing, Picture of the borrower tool in hand, dated and signed for. I have gotten tools back that I forgot I owned and have not had to chase things. 8) best one was the jumper cable "still in the box" my brother borrowed ,"hadn't seen them in about ten years".
Anyone who's ask's for money is told where to go right then and there !! Go see the wife, she work's at a bank and can get a credit check and help with the loan application ;)