Since Pat's back surgery two weeks ago, I have done what I know how to do and what I have been told to do, but I am still a wreck, failure, or whatever else you would call being completely out of my comfort zone.
The church ladies have brought several meals, and there is Chinese take out, but I have not done well in the food department. I am satisfied with sandwiches, but that will not work but just a few times.
Then there is dish washing. I have learned to clean up immediately at the end of the meal, wipe off the table, and put everything up. No dirty dishes is a good thing.
The whites go in one washing load and the colored clothes go in another. When the drier buzzer goes off, the clothes come out immediately or you will be fluffing them with a little more run time.
The beds hafta be changed. Everything comes off and to the washer I go. Meanwhile I gotta wrestle with putting the clean sheets, etc. on the bed.
Oh DanG, it is lunchtime and I have not even thought about lunch. Chinese takeout will work only once. :-\
MM, that sounds like my life, as I am a bachelor. :D :D All the good local restaurants know me by name now.
MM you beat my first wife by a mile! If I didn't already have numder 2, i might have gave you a shot. those are fine qualitys in a woman. Just kiddin. cant wait to meet you mon or tuesday ill be in rusk one of those days. your wife has a good man. there are few left. as my moma says
DanG Magic....where were you when I had the Flu?
Sounds like devotion to me, Lynn. :-*
I know where you are coming from Lynn. It is hard for us old dogs to learn new tricks. I have been doing the house work for the last six months. I would rather saw dry hickory than do house work.
Lynn, I know exactly where you are coming from. I tend to put the dirty dishes right in the dishwasher, without scrubbing them in the sink, the wash water from from the dishwasher goes right into the pipe under the sink. When I need clean socks or underwear, get them out of the drier where they are left after drying....both completely un-acceptable. You didn't mention dusting, vacuuming and mopping, which have to be done in a certain sequence and time frame. Why does the bed have to be made up all spiffy when it will get all tumbled up again in a few hours ? Men make lousy house keepers, especially when supervised by the woman of the house....Nelda and I have more or less come to grips with most of the difficulties after 14 years, but I'll have to admit, I'm a pretty bad housewife
;D You have company....
ps having a sawmill and logs in the back yard don't make it any easier....
Quote from: pigman on December 06, 2013, 08:40:40 PM
I know where you are coming from Lynn. It is hard for us old dogs to learn new tricks. I have been doing the house work for the last six months. I would rather saw dry hickory than do house work.
:D :D :D :D :D :D
You've been away from the sawmill to long Bob. Otherwise you know what you said is not true. ;D ;D ;D
Hickory ? smiley_furious3
It takes two,to run a house. My wife has been laid up for a few weeks at a time. And than when summer gets here,I'm outside alot more and not helping out inside. She misses the little things that I do. She does most of the inside work and I do most of the outside work.
Quote from: pineywoods on December 06, 2013, 08:45:56 PMYou didn't mention dusting, vacuuming and mopping, which have to be done in a certain sequence and time frame.
Yup, I did forget to mention that. I am/was not complaining, just sorta running through the things that she does every day that I never think about. I would make a very poor wife.
It is interesting how in many of our relationships [lives/marrages, etc] we take on various roles and activites associated with day to day living, and forget what our partners do to keep our joint lives on track.
My wife is just recovering from 6 weeks of rehab following a horse riding accident.
I can relate to all the posts above about how much work our partners do for us [and us in return].
I had surgery last spring and my wife took on all my extra chores and now that I have done hers in return for a few weeks I really appreciate what she has done for me over the last 30 years.
In my opinion, I believe [we all] need to remeber to do something a little special every once in a while [for both of us] to celebrate life with the special friends/people so dear to us.
Tom
Amen, just asked when the sheets were going on, " I have already put them on" she said, :)
Love every minute with her, be lost without her, david
Don't forget a clean floor gets you brownie points.
When cleaning the bathroom, always be sure to dry the seat,
otherwise someone might be surprised and then you will loose
the brownie points!
It is good to help out once in a while, a good husband will
always try to pick up his shoes when the wife is vacuuming.
Sounds like a lot of trouble but it's better than having them
thrown at him.
It seems that Pat has a pretty good husband.
Like the others have said, I know what you are talking about. My wife's ovarian cancer surgery then 3 years ago she got her foot crushed at work. She is still using a cane to get around on. We are thankful every day. I am really thankful both of our girls would stop by and help, the youngest did the washing, the oldest did the shopping. It is easy to take their work for granted until you have to add it to your list of things to do. I am shocked at the number of men that don't or won't step up. Prayers for your wife's health improving.
First of all please tell Pat we wish her a quick recovery, and so far it sounds like you make a way better wife than I ever would! ;)
From a current "house husband".
Slow Cooker is your friend. Throw all the fixings in in the morning, and just forget it. Dinner time comes around and there is a big bowl of Stew / Curry / Chilli all ready to go. We have a "go to" with a Coconut curry chicken, with the veges and potatoes all mixed in.
As for the intricacies of laundry... You are on your own there :D
Ian
Like many men I can comfortably live in clutter. My wife has had to help out with her family in Vermont 3 separate times over the past year. During the week or so when she is away the house gets a bit messy. I have to take several hours to "tidy up" before she gets home. This topic reminds me that I need to tell her later today how much I appreciate coming home to a clean house.
You might make a poor wife, but are a great husband for trying so hard!
It certainly is an eye opener when half the team goes down. :D A few years ago, Cowboy Bob had a major surgery that put him down for 3 weeks, and on limited duty for another three afterward.
In addition to bringing in the wood, and keeping the fire going, there was the critters to feed and grass to mow. I did his hauling work for three weeks, with an Amish teen helping load the calves and cows. Even though I'd been with him hundreds of times, I never had to set up the route and handle the paper work alone. I had to reject a calf and listen to the farmer tell me I didn't know what I was doing, just like Bob puts up with everyday.
The upswing was that although I thought I knew how he felt at the end of the day, I got an education in the difference between riding along, and being in charge. No one was happier than I was when he went out there and swung himself back up in that truck!
Magic, I'll bet Pat thinks you're the best wife she's ever had. :)
As stated you are a great husband/person for doing all you do for Pat and others! I hope she recovers quickly. As for the domestic duties I am usually in charge of the outside stuff. Inside stuff I may help with a few items but not much. My dad stated many times over his life he is glad he was not born a woman and I must agree with him! It was not a derogatory comment but meant how hard it was for him when he tried to do the things mom did.
MM its a learning curve.. like anything else.
Ive never been married, spent more than a decade as a bachelor, and another decade on the road full time. I was also a caretaker for a very ill girl friend for about 8 years (that was couch/bed ridden). Being a bachelor first, really rounded me out, because about the only "domestic" duty I didnt conquer was sewing. Otherwise, I can handle all the domestic chores with ease, and care taking as well. I will mention, Im a mechanic, so this is a bit off from my core skills set.
I have a very accommodating girl friend right now, that enjoys the domestic chores and is a world class chef, but for no reason yesterday, I did the dishes, cleaned the kitchen, 3 loads of laundry, vacuumed the house, mostly because it was 12 degrees with a 20+mph wind, and I really didnt "feel" like working outside.
I could have done other things, and not really even sure what got me started, old habits, Im used to being self sufficient ?
Just a little secret Magic Man. You can put all of the colors and whites in 1 load. Just put some fabric softener in the load and they all smell good. Hope she gets better.
Like Windy Acres, was young and mom was not much of housekeeper more of a hoarder (ok 100% hoarder) which I guess I'm starting to become too. :-[
As a kid I did all my own housework kept my own room clean and did my own cooking often even made family meals regularly. Made first Thanksgiving feast at 14yr old from turkey, stuffing to taters and gravy! 8) But I also spent a lot of time in there as a kid with my older sister who schooled me on finer art of cooking grub. Military also kept ya sharp on the cleaning aspect of life from barracks to my own room. Got married but my wife was not much of a cleaner either so did most of that but eventually got tired of doing it all & went back to bachelor life ;). Have long time live in GF (her house but I keep my own pad just in case ;) ::)
This week was more house work for me than Home work for school or Farm Work in woods or on cars. Spent much of Thursday doing chores outside house and inside house. Did some work for school too but most of the day was dog bathing, laundry, dishes, cleaning kitchen, making dinner etc. Friday was school day and cold snowy but after school on way home picked up woman, went shopping and then some down time.
Anyhow got finals for this schooling stuff again so got to get on some studying to keep up the GPA.
Keep up good work MM it gets easier. Though I did just start a new load of laundry in this new fangled washer, glad I have an engineering degree ::) :D
Mark
Quote from: Farmerjw on December 06, 2013, 11:10:28 PM
>>snip>>
I am shocked at the number of men that don't or won't step up. Prayers for your wife's health improving.
When my wife was being treated for breast cancer, the check-in nurse at the Oncology department said something like "Its nice to see you still with her" after we had been going to treatments for a couple of years. I asked her what she meant and she said, most men will leave their wives in such cases :-[ To hear such a thing made me very angry - My vows were for better or worse. Granted it was terminal, but that doesn't make a real man not love his partner any less :o
MM,
Your a man of MANY talents - I think most of us strive to be a fraction of them! ;)
mm I know what you are talking about, after my wifes stroke I have realized how much a I taken for granted when she was in good health, thank the lord for our children and grandchildren, I cant cook.
ljohnsaw, my wife got told the same thing when she had surgery for kidney cancer. She was shocked and I was mad. >:(
Quote from: two tired on December 07, 2013, 01:50:55 PM
I cant cook.
Kind works like this, you get tired of eating the same thing over and over, at some point, you learn how to cook. I can eat the same thing back to back for about week or so, then things need to change a little. I will admit, at certain parts of living on my own, I did frequent restaurants. But even when on per-dium, I would buy groceries and cook for myself in the apartments and dined alone. Got tired of eating out, even when not on my dime.
As far as leaving your wife or significant other when they are ill, is unthinkable, my lord, I cant even rap my mind around that. That is just unthinkable. Especially if they are terminally ill, to pull the rug out from under their feet, WOW, that should be a crime, that's inhumane. At the same time, I guess I should not be surprised it happens.
Sorry to hear of your troubles Magicman, been down that road myself 3yrs ago when wife had brain surgery. Found out real quick just how much she does that I did not notice.
Found out I must be a good cook though, because after a week or so of my kitchen mayhem, she was back on her feet. Seems the fear of being poisioned is a great motivator. :D
In all seriousness it was a wake up call for how diffrent life would be without her, and I try to keep that in mind.
(tumor was benign, and she has made a great recovery) Hoping you all the best in her recovery.
I can't stand doing the dishes or clothes. I use procrastination by letting the dishes "soak" for a while I go outside in hopes that "somebody" will wash them while I am gone ;D ;D ;D
(https://forestryforum.com/gallery/albums/userpics/33361/image%7E7.jpg)
Deese,that works about as well as it does in my house. ::)
Yep. I ended up washing them. :-\
Deese, they make a machine called a dishwasher, works good ;D. We had one for a while that was roll-around portable. Hooked on to an adapter on the kitchen sink. Then just leave the cleaned dishes in the washer, retrieve as needed.
My brother calls an electric dishwasher an "electric woman" That is why he has already been divorced twice.
I'm truly blessed when it comes to dishwashing, my wife actually claims it's her "me time" and enjoys doing them calling it therapeutic. I love to cook (on the grill or smoker), don't mind laundry, but hate dishes! I don't have a clue what I'd do without her, if you'd seen my house and her's before we were married you'd know why :D.
Today i turn 51.... which the email from FF got me to show up for a few minutes, and this is the first thing i read... and it gets me thinkin.... pert near 14 years ago i got tired of my own cookin and cleanin and got hitched... we eventually had three kids [oldest made 13 yesterday now his age and show size are the same.... whole nother storyline] and i find I am still eating my own cooking, and i do the laundry cause around here ya open yer mouth and say something about the way its done and oops the job is mine....
I still cant clean house worth a dang, i tried using duct tap and the leaf blower but the leaf bower was stronger than the duct tape cept on the little stuff and then the adhesive had to be washed off and it took more time to did that than to just pic it up and dust....
My wife works as a GM for a local resort, so she is gone from the house 5 days a week, and 14 hours on Mon-Tues cause she also cooks at the resort and they are on winter hours and laid back on the help [owner figgers he can cut the help and hire new ones if the old ones dont come back.... oye vey] so the last thing she does is wanna clean the house or cook the victuals, or wash the laundry.... now i know why some of the mormons had 2 or more wives! [yeah like that would go over in my house, they would gang up on me and i would never be able to get any hunting time in!]
Anyhow i make a poor wife too, but my cooking aint bad, every once in a while the dog even wags her tail cause it smells good and the kids tell me it was better than what they et at school lunch.
Laff a little, pray alot, and thank the ALmighty for another day walking on the grass and not looking at its roots!
William
Idaho
Happy Birthday William!
I liked the post.
thanks sam I really like to make folks smile once in awhile....
The other night I was down to the grocery store with my wife and at the checkout she went over and bought about 8 or 9 Carmex lip blams for chapped lips.... sooooooo
I said "when i was a kid dad had us put cow manure on chapped lips, it didnt cure em, but it sure kept us from lickin our lips"..... checker lady burst into laughter and near tears said she was gonna have to write that down and tell her boyfriend cause he owned cows..... made my day.
William
Idaho
Lynn, I suppose you could be trained to make a fair wife, but I sure wouldn't want to wake up next to you. :D
Lynn just do what Pat tell's and you will be fine that's what I do and it work's smiley_bounce :snowball:
Quote from: pineywoods on December 08, 2013, 02:12:32 PM
Deese, they make a machine called a dishwasher, works good ;D. We had one for a while that was roll-around portable. Hooked on to an adapter on the kitchen sink. Then just leave the cleaned dishes in the washer, retrieve as needed.
I ain't never seen one of them things before ??? ??? ???
Heck, we just got running water down here. ;D
No matter how hard i felt i worked, I always thought Mrs. Beaver had it tougher than I did. Given the choice, i would not want to switch roles at all. I truly appreciate everything she does for me an never try to take any of it for granted. I hate to admit it, but there are appliances in this house that I have never run in the 12 years we have lived here. Washer, dryer, dish washer.....she always takes care of all of that with a smile. Darn good woman
Today was clothes washing day again. All of my heavy clothes from the Texas trip. I am not telling but I left a handkerchief in my denim bibby pocket and now I have a blue handkerchief. ;D
I did the bed and dishes so now I need to dust and vacuum. Housework is never done.
Pat is making some recovery, but this is going to be slow. Thankfully she is no longer taking any pain meds, but this recovery is much more than either of us thought.
You're a good Hubby Magic..... laundry-smiley
But if you really wanna make her happy....clean out from under the refrigerator! :D
I do most of the laundry and dishes, my dirty clothes get hot water all else gets cold, coloured or not.
Christmas tree and decorations today, putting up the tree, need to measure and cut again cause it is 12" to tall.
Then my 1.5 year old Granddaughter is coming for Christmas and I have been told to child proof the house ::) that is going to be a whole day project, my wife loves trinkets ;)
As of tue morn, I am now a full time member of magic's "poor wife" club.
Wife lost her balance and fell backwards on a concrete floor. Landed on her head and left hip which was only 10% functional. Now 0% functional due to bad bruises, pain and soreness. Transfer from bed to wheelchair to bathroom to recliner and back again taking a toll on my back and shoulders.
I'm confined to the house except trips to the barn for more firewood. Church ladies already bringing vittles, so not all bad. Lordy, them ladies can cook 8)
Sure sorry to hear that Piney. Prayers for her to get back to some semblance of moving around by herself.
I'm sure she is quite grateful for your presence and help.
Hang in there...
:o What could this mean?? ???
(https://forestryforum.com/gallery/albums/userpics/20011/DSCN1821.JPG)
Then ain't my toes. :)
It could mean to use toenail clippers next time instead of wire cutters. :D
That big toe could use a little filing on the nail.
Nice foot though. smiley_thumbsup
....I'm glad that's not your foot Magic. When I first saw the picture, I thought you were coming out of the closet. :o
It means that Pat is a lucky gal....and I need to show this picture to Cowboy Bob!!
I sure couldn't do that for my wife. ;D Her feet are so ticklish, she'd go hysterical. But I have had to about hog tie her to use the wire cutters on the nails.. :-[ It's weird how strokes affect things. Her left foot is completely immobile, can't even wiggle a toe, but the feeling nerves are super touchy...
My wife has broken 3 different toes on 1 foot. The Doctor told her you just can't fix a broken toe.....so all the Docs did was just tape them up.
She has a pretty right foot but her left foot looks like something from Jurassic Park. :o I kid you not....I tease her about sitting on a limb like an Owl all the time. :D
Sounds like a good way for you to be out on a limb. ;D
Quote from: Magicman on December 15, 2013, 07:25:41 PM
Sounds like a good way for you to be out on a limb. ;D
:D :D :D
Quote from: POSTONLT40HD on December 15, 2013, 06:12:16 PM
My wife has broken 3 different toes on 1 foot.
Sounds like your wife needs to kick you with the other foot or you need to behave so she doesn't have to kick you.
Quote from: pigman on December 15, 2013, 08:25:31 PM
Quote from: POSTONLT40HD on December 15, 2013, 06:12:16 PM
My wife has broken 3 different toes on 1 foot.
Sounds like your wife needs to kick you with the other foot or you need to behave so she doesn't have to kick you.
:D :D :D You're right Pigman.
Quote from: POSTONLT40HD on December 15, 2013, 06:12:16 PM
My wife has broken 3 different toes on 1 foot. The Doctor told her you just can't fix a broken toe.....so all the Docs did was just tape them up.
She has a pretty right foot but her left foot looks like something from Jurassic Park. :o I kid you not....I tease her about sitting on a limb like an Owl all the time. :D
:D :D :D
Gutsy? Stupid? Gutsy? Stupid? You pick ;D
Quote from: Holmes on December 15, 2013, 09:05:43 PM
Quote from: POSTONLT40HD on December 15, 2013, 06:12:16 PM
My wife has broken 3 different toes on 1 foot. The Doctor told her you just can't fix a broken toe.....so all the Docs did was just tape them up.
She has a pretty right foot but her left foot looks like something from Jurassic Park. :o I kid you not....I tease her about sitting on a limb like an Owl all the time. :D
:D :D :D
Gutsy? Stupid? Gutsy? Stupid? You pick ;D
Stupid! :D
Quotesitting on a limb like an Owl
Now that's funny, I don't care who you are!! laugh_at laugh_at laugh_at
great storys all. with my second wife ive became the house wife. mainly cause she makes alot more money than i do. so in tell she has to work alot more being out of town. So i get to play housewife and mister mom to our 5 yr old and 2 yr old girls. its getting better now cause the 5 yr old is picking up on mommas o.c.d on keeping the house up. most of the time. but sometimes you walk out of the living room go to bathroom for 5 minutes and it looks like bomb went off. i am very happy when my 15 yr old daughter comes over on the weekend. after mommas been gone all week. let me tell ya i would rather be logging than a stay at home dad any day.
P.S. our dishwasher broke and after a bout a month i was very happy at getting a new one. those things are life savers. merry christmas
:o Another dishwasher bites the dust. :)
Today was bed changing day (because I forgot yesterday), dusting, vacuuming, and it seems that every day is clothes washing day. I handle the dishes after every meal. smiley_idea
Quote from: pigman on December 06, 2013, 08:40:40 PM
I know where you are coming from Lynn. It is hard for us old dogs to learn new tricks. I have been doing the house work for the last six months. I would rather saw dry hickory than do house work.
I've been at it since 2009 when my wife became disabled. I had never cooked anything more than a fried egg in my whole life. If it weren't for the prepared foods, prepackaged spices for various dishes, crock pots, etc....
I found that the packs of "Beef stew" spices for he crockpot work just as well for pork. Probably would for chicken also but I don't like to do chicken in the crockpot. They get "Shake and Bake" and the oven.
House work? I have a cleaning lady come in twice a month to chisel away at the debris :)
Harry K
I also got reminded that today was toilet cleaning day. Oh Boy, my favorite, but she does it every week without a word ever being said.
I have found that there are many small steps that I can and should make that will make her life easier in the future.
A clean house seems to have a soothing effect on women. I like a clean house too.. but I'd rather be outside.. so I usually leave the cleaning for nighttime or bad weather. It def. takes a lot to keep a household running. Hope your wife is feeling better for the holidays.. Merry Christmas!
Quote from: Magicman on December 24, 2013, 08:28:52 PM
I also got reminded that today was toilet cleaning day.
I have found that there are many small steps that I can and should make that will make her life easier in the future.
If you are taking small steps I would put the outhouse close to the house.
I have done the "quick step" before. :D
Quote from: Magicman on December 24, 2013, 09:33:59 PM
I have done the "quick step" before. :D
Magicman,
Sometimes it's not possible to be quick enough!
Herb
Quote from: PC-Urban-Sawyer on December 24, 2013, 10:03:20 PM
Quote from: Magicman on December 24, 2013, 09:33:59 PM
I have done the "quick step" before. :D
Magicman,
Sometimes it's not possible to be quick enough!
Herb
As in the day I was cutting wood in a forest of stinging nettles...
Harry K
Lynn, you are doing good work. Hope Pat's recovery is a quick one.
I work nights and weekends at my job, and the pay isn't great. For years I cut grass and truck farmed in the summer and cut firewood in the winter to make ends meet. Then 13 years ago Margie got elected to a county office, and her pay went from about equal to mine to three times as much. I laid the chainsaw down, stopped planting a big pea patch, and as my grass cutting customers died off, I didn't go looking for new ones. Margie puts in more hours, and her stress level is so much higher than mine, that I do help out all I can around the house. We do have a cleaning lady that comes in twice a month, but I do the dishes, and all the laundry except for Margie's work clothes. {I dyed a few of my shirts blue just a couple of weeks ago} Margie loves to cook, and still does on the weekends. I try to cook at least one or two nights during the week, if I'm off work. Our sharing of the work has evolved over time, and as she will tell anyone that will listen, she has three years and seven days until she retires. So it will change again then. With my back the way it is, a sink full of dishes isn't near a bad as a long row of peas.
Larro
Was catching up on this thread since visiting mid December. Sorry to hear of your wife's issues Piney.
MM you are a great guy and good at toe nail polishing, I am sure it was fun or funny for both involved. Saw the Gumbo post and it looked as if Pat was cooking, hope so. I know my wife gets pleasure from cooking and pleasing family/guests.
Yup, she did all of the cooking and I did all of the helping and go-fer-ing. ;D
Very glad to hear she is up and about and doing better. Just read the Siatic update and saw there she was up and comfortable barefoot. That is great and allow her to show off them pretty red toe nails!
I can relate Lynn!
When Kathy had her hip replacement done I was pretty good at the nursing part of it but my 2 daughters booted me out of the house work and cooking department pretty fast. The youngest came home every weekend and cooked for a weeks worth and my oldest daughter would stop to do the laundry and such about twice a week and told me to stick to sawing logs.
My daughter in law said "Dad you can do just about everything very well but please stay out of moms kitchen accept to tidy up after meals and empty the dish washer". She wouldnt even let me load the dish washer. She stopped every evening on her way home from work to make sure we were both getting a decent supper. Glad I got great kids that are all pretty close and a daughter in law that is just like one of my own kids.
Glad to hear that Pat is improving and healing every day.
Lynn, certainly good to learn that Pat is progressing and getting on fairly well. Pleased that she survived your 'house wifery'. MM, you have talent you didn't even know you had. We wish you a great 2014.
Norm & Mary
Quote from: Magicman on December 24, 2013, 11:21:00 AM
........ and it seems that every day is clothes washing day. ...........
Dont ya just love the "15 minutes" that of ALL the laundry is done....... ;-)
William